The year was 1984.

I was 10 years old

I lived with my family on the island of Guam.

My single mother was in the Navy, and when we got stationed there, I thought we had been sent to a paradise that was heaven on earth. I never imagined I could feel such a deep sense of belonging surrounded by vast ocean and deep luscious jungles…. Things that can also feel ominous and daunting. I mean, there were wild boars that you might meet!

But there were also infinite sunny days and perpetual sea shores waving in masses of delightful sea shells.

Weekends were filled with topless tours in my mom’s red jeep, learning indigenous practices at the village of Inarajan, seashell hunting, dancing under the stars, and long hikes exploring coves and tide pools on low tide walks to the reef. I would eagerly think to myself, ‘maybe today we will see dolphins swimming at the edge.’ I wasn’t even afraid of that coral water snake that I almost stepped on!

I was wild and free…. A princess of adventures, soft with a faithful heart of courage.

The whole 6 mile wide and 32 mile long island was an entire world that seemed to wrap me in a hug of an idyllic life. I felt deeply connected to the land there. Even more, I felt loved and celebrated by the matriarchal culture and my native family that seemed to adore me. I soaked in the legendary ghost stories and traditional folklore. I loved the way that life was celebrated every weekend with a feast of music. The entire community would come together to get grounded in the weekly routine of connection over a roasted pig and a scrumptious buffet — reminders to celebrate the bounty of life! These festive evenings were ritual bookends to lovingly hold my weeks in place. I always looked forward to the those humid starry nights spent dancing into the dawn with ageless souls in physical bodies of every age, shape, and gender.

Everybody was welcome.

Every spirit was celebrated.

No one was excluded.

Guam was a place that nourished my soul, and to my young self, there was no such thing as ‘not belonging.’ Sometimes, I still don’t understand why my own skin is not also brown.

At the time, my wish was to grow up and be a hula dancer! I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate island life while also getting to wear a pretty plumeria in my hair. Every time I smell that tropical pheromone, I feel bathed in a warm, feminine, earthy essence, and I feel as luminous and full as the moon.

I’m revisited by the tranquil song that soothed my soul into hula dancing the island energy right through me…

🎶 On the Island of Guam.

There are coconut trees

It’s a beautiful day

When the moon is shining

Over the sea 🎶

But Guam was also the place that I experienced one of my most horrific traumas. That same year, there was an incident with my baby sitter. A military man. A friend of the family. A man I knew, trusted, and had so much fun with because he was my friend.

My innocence lost, shame turned my feminine body into my worst enemy.

The ensuing court case felt more traumatic than the event itself.

Our family friend was kicked out of the Navy and suffered jail time.

While most people might celebrate that justice was served, it didn’t feel that way to me.

I felt like I betrayed our friend and his misfortune was my fault.

Additionally, the courts were eluding to an investigation of parental neglect, and there was talk about my mom possibly losing her children. Because when nobody would hear me at home, I used my voice to tell my teacher how I didn’t feel safe at home. I turned to my community to ask for help.

How could I do this to my family? I panicked inside and scorned myself for betraying my mom too. That moment, I became the parentified child by earning an Academy Award for convincing the courts that I was absolutely fine and there was no harm to see here.

Erase myself. Problem solved.

Not only did I not process that trauma, but we all acted like it never even happened. Was my innocence ever even real? Or, was I shame from the very start? Was my voice real? Because I didn’t feel like I had any power anymore. Without an acknowledgement of my own experience to transmute the trauma, I wondered if I was even real….

Don’t get me wrong, the court case was full of stories, and facts, and justice, but the humanity of my own experience was missing.

This is the part where I developed the belief that I had to give up being who I am in order to be in a relationship. (Carl Jung’s basic definition of the Mermaid Archetype). Remember, The Little Mermaid gave up her voice in order to get legs and be part of the human world.

I gave up being a child in order to become the family caretaker and protector. I swapped my soft, playful, feminine, connection for a rigid uber-independent dance of defensiveness and over responsibility.

Disconnected from my voice, I felt helpless, hopeless, and untethered in the abyss of unprocessed emotions in the realm of my unconscious. Most days I felt small and like I would drown in the feeling of overwhelm. So, there it remained, a lost voice longing to be reclaimed by its lost soul.

At the heart of it all, a mermaid spirit has the ability to take trauma and transform it into something beautiful.

Cue the ocean goddess, Yemaya. 🧜‍♀️

Yemaya heals the mother wound in us. She is often represented as a mermaid, and she is the goddess of motherhood and mother of all creation. She’s fiercely protective and puts the needs of her children first. Well-being is her passion, and she’s full of grit, grace, and that maternal wisdom that bathes you in love and nourishes your soul. Straight up facts, mermaid spirits — this is my business!

I’m a mermaid spirit personified, and I help channel that loving energy straight to you! You can call upon Yemaya for cultivating loving relationships and when you need gentle teaching and loving guidance. Yemaya infuses your life with the power of feminine energy — the source of creativity, nurturing, and compassion. This will reorder your life in ways that will make you feel deeply connected to yourself and your world. You simply won’t know what ‘not belonging’ feels like anymore.

Parentified children that lost their souls are ones who receive the most benefits of working with Mermaids, as love dissolves the rigid and defensive ego in order to make room for a transformative rebirth.

You get to rediscover the innocence of your inner child — the one that was resourced with a loving and nurturing environment and born anew! All this feminine energy and mermaid magic will have you feeling centered, balanced, peaceful, and confident. It’s a magical thing to leave self-doubt behind and believe in the magic of YOU.

I am your Magical Mermaid midwife guiding you with ease and flow into your own expanded consciousness. Because the journey can sometimes feel scary and painful as we step deeper into the void of uncertainty and leave our pain bodies behind. We fear the feelings of ambiguity and emptiness.

For real… choosing to support yourself with a more pleasurable and fun journey is the first act of love that you can decide upon!

Together, we start with designing your soul compass.

It will guide you to find your voice and connect to your soul-power.

And from there, you’ll be guided to treasures that only your soul knows.

As I write this now, I’m at the most surprising place I never thought I’d be.

When creating my own soul compass, my soul whispered, “I am the joyful dance between everything and nothing.”

And somehow, right after my own rebirth experience, I found myself dancing again.

It’s not the hula this time, but 40 years later, I have discovered that dance is the one thing that makes me feel most alive and connected to myself. Dancing is how a mermaid flows on land!

I now see my body as an ever flowing expression of art and I’m so in love with every part of it — shame dissolved by self love. My soul compass has lead me to a life better than I ever dreamed for myself.

My rebirth experience has opened me up to creating a life that I absolutely adore and I’d love to guide you into stepping into your own power to create the same for you.

My favorite part is that I discovered I never have to give up the magic of being a mermaid. You can flow effortlessly between the duality of being a flawsome human and a magical mythical work of art. Embracing your mermaid spirit means to fully embody the concept of being in this world, but not of this world. While being human, you are connected to the mystery of life that feels otherworldly and you can bring forth (birth or manifest) universal secrets from other realms.

You’ve read this far… so, now we both know you’re a mermaid! 🧜‍♀️♥️🧜‍♀️

The only thing worse than not living the life you imagined, is waiting one more day to choose it.

Let’s design your soul compass.

Click the button below so we can chat, soul to soul, you sparkly mermaid!